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For those not in the know regarding the title hereof, “:rolleyes:” is
the message-board code to get the little smiley-face/emoticon with eyes
rolling in nettled fashion to appear in your message. It expresses the
precise emotion of this article and how I feel about the endless circularity
of the arguments that are posted on message boards by fellas who on the
surface appear to be well-versed in the many maxims of fantasy football.
I can recall four incessant, raging debates that went on
last year until kickoff of Week 1. The debates all revolved around perceived position battles at the key
position, the heart, of a fantasy football team, running back, or in real,
specific football terms, tailback. Specifically, these deluded fantasy
footballers perceived “battles” between: Priest Holmes and Tony Richardson in
Kansas City (:rolleyes:), Ahman Green and Dorsey Levens in Green Bay
(:rolleyes: twice and :shakeyourhead:), Charlie Garner and Tyrone Wheatley in
Oakland (:rolleyes: and :sigh:), and Tshimanga Biakabutuka and Richard
Huntley in Carolina
(:rolloneeyegruesomelylikeinTheExorcistcopycatflickBeyondtheDoor:). If you
think you can dig up any of these threads, by all means go for it, and,
please, forward them to me and bump them to the top of the FF Today message
board. I would like to recall some of the handles of these clowns.
Moving right along, anybody with any fantasy football sense,
no, basic football sense, would all but know how these situations were going
to pan out…
The
KC “Clash”: Last year’s
offseason rhetoric aside, Holmes was the guy brought in by the new regime. It
did not take much FF savvy to realize that the kind of back Holmes is fits
and could thrive in Vermeil’s system and the kind of back that Richardson is
does not, not even close.
The
“Mêlée” in the Northern Bay:
Give me a break! The Levens-to-Green transition of ’01 practically mirrored
the Bennett-to-Levens transition back in ’97. If how this situation was going
to pan out was not as plain as the nose on your face, you need to find
another hobby, one that ideally does not involve forecasting of any kind.
The
“Battle” of the Bay area:
Though not quite as lucid, it still could be boiled down to some basic facts:
Garner was the more complete and better overall back; Gruden handpicked
Garner, whom he had coached in Philadelphia and, moreover, liked and, in
accordance, was a player familiar with his system; Garner was going to be the
sole yardage guy without doubt;
Wheatley was at best looking at being one
of the (short-yardage) touchdown guys along with Zack Crockett and Jon
Ritchie (had he been healthier); Wheatley looked like dog poo last preseason.
Now, to understand the Carolina “Conflict”, one must be a
more evolved fantasy football creature, but to sum it up: any football scout
with skills knew/would know that Biakabutuka, when healthy, which, granted,
was not often, was, in fact, an NFL-caliber starting tailback; Seifert knew
this and, if you have any ability to read between the lines, liked Timmy.
Huntley, on the contrary, stunk, stinks and will always stink and was brought
in simply to light a fire under Biakabutuka’s butt. This strategy was
actually working and Tim was holding on to his #1 spot in, moreover, what was
a make-or-break season for him. Unfortunately, he “broke.” Huntley still
amounted to nothing, evidenced by where he is now, as in not back in Carolina
and fourth on the depth chart.
All of these scenarios I
stated in elaborate terms again and again on the threads and had to
constantly fend off the “geeks.”
The point of all of this is that every year there are
situations that, to the savvy and seasoned fantasy footballer, obviously
point in a particular direction and will, in all likelihood, bear out a
foreseeable conclusion, yet will have to be fought over with the idiots.
Without further ado, here are, in no particular order, some guys set up for
success this year, and regardless of the debates that are (being) waged on
internet message boards and chatrooms, or on bar stools or living room
couches for that matter, do not be conned into believing otherwise:
QB
Brad Johnson, Buccaneers –
I have beaten this horse dead, through rigor mortis and now on into the
decomposition stages. To get my take on Brad, peruse my last piece located
at: http://www.fftoday.com/guest/stegeman/johnson_sucks.htm.
WR
Terry Glenn, Packers –
This guy is so set up to succeed with the master Brett Favre and a franchise
known for its rags-to-riches mystique. Terry has skills and has absolutely no competition for his gig
as Favre’s #1 “right-hand man.” Do not let anybody tell you otherwise. He has
“great value” written all over him this year.
RB
Travis Henry, Bills – Do
not let the hype about Shawn Bryson fool you. Henry is their guy. Bryson
could get traded and have some value, but as it stands now, with the Bills,
Bryson = Darick Holmes… remember him? Barely, right?
RB Michael Pittman, Buccaneers – I
get a kick out of how guys are reacting to Pittman over at the boards. It is
like they have been sniffin’ at the garbage bin and see this one untouched
Nutter Butter cookie (Pittman) and do not know whether they should pick it up
and eat it or not. Moreover, they are looking over both shoulders trying to
make sure they are not seen doing what they are doing… kind of like the way
they sniffed and skulked around the Priest last year. Same commentary, same
lackluster predictions, same rhetoric! 2,169 yards and 10 TD’s later?!?!?! I
am not saying that Pittman will be this year’s Holmes, leading the league in
rushing and all. But, let’s face the facts. Gruden handpicked the guy. He has
Wheatley 2000 written all over him. Temper your predictions, but know that
1,100 to 1,250 yards rushing and 7 to 9 touchdowns are “in the cards,” now
that Pittman is not “with the Cards.”
RB
Kevan Barlow, 49ers –
Garrison Hearst was thē story…
of last year. Now is the time for the 49ers to get on with their future,
which at the position of tailback is Barlow. Hearst will still get some, but Barlow will get more TD’s
and if any“one” is getting 1,000 yards there, it will be Barlow.
RB
Ricky Williams, Dolphins –
This is pretty much a no-brainer, but I have seen the occasional thread
expressing concern over Williams and how productive he will be this year.
Listen, on my main team in my main league, the GBRFL, I have both Holmes and
Green, and I will honestly tell you that with Norv Turner in Miami I expect
Ricky Williams to be the #2 fantasy back this season! :eek:
WR
Raghib Ismail, Cowboys –
The ’Boys offense and, moreover, their passing game will improve this year,
and Ismail, not Galloway, will be the greater beneficiary. While all the hype
continues to go to Galloway, it was Ismail, who put up respectable numbers in
’01, not Galloway, and Ismail actually suffered his ACL injury EIGHT weeks later
than Galloway. Do not get very lofty with your projections, but just know
that Ismail is the better choice of the two and can be had five to, perhaps,
ten rounds later.
Anybody that tells you otherwise is a fool himself, fooling
with you or, worse yet, trying to fool you! I fool you not! ;)
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