For those not in the
know regarding the title hereof, “:rolleyes:” is the message-board
code to get the little smiley-face/emoticon with eyes rolling in nettled
fashion to appear in your message. It expresses the precise emotion of
this article and how I feel about the endless circularity of the arguments
that are posted on message boards by fellas who on the surface appear to
be well-versed in the many maxims of fantasy football.
I can recall four incessant, raging debates that went on last year
until kickoff of Week 1. The debates all revolved around perceived
position battles at the key position, the heart, of a fantasy football
team, running back, or in real, specific football terms, tailback.
Specifically, these deluded fantasy footballers perceived “battles”
between: Priest Holmes and Tony Richardson in Kansas City (:rolleyes:),
Ahman Green and Dorsey Levens in Green Bay (:rolleyes: twice and :shakeyourhead:),
Charlie Garner and Tyrone Wheatley in Oakland (:rolleyes: and :sigh:), and
Tshimanga Biakabutuka and Richard Huntley in Carolina (:rolloneeyegruesomelylikeinTheExorcistcopycatflickBeyondtheDoor:).
If you think you can dig up any of these threads, by all means go for it,
and, please, forward them to me and bump them to the top of the FF Today
message board. I would like to recall some of the handles of these clowns.
Moving right along, anybody with any fantasy football sense, no,
basic football sense, would all but know how these situations were going
to pan out…
KC “Clash”: Last
year’s offseason rhetoric aside, Holmes was the guy brought in by the
new regime. It did not take much FF savvy to realize that the kind of back
Holmes is fits and could thrive in Vermeil’s system and the kind of back
that Richardson is does not, not even close.
“Mêlée” in the Northern Bay:
Give me a break! The Levens-to-Green transition of ’01 practically
mirrored the Bennett-to-Levens transition back in ’97. If how this
situation was going to pan out was not as plain as the nose on your face,
you need to find another hobby, one that ideally does not involve
forecasting of any kind.
“Battle” of the Bay area:
Though not quite as lucid, it still could be boiled down to some basic
facts: Garner was the more complete and better overall back; Gruden
handpicked Garner, whom he had coached in Philadelphia and, moreover,
liked and, in accordance, was a player familiar with his system; Garner
was going to be the sole yardage
guy without doubt; Wheatley was at best looking at being one
of the (short-yardage) touchdown guys along with Zack Crockett and Jon
Ritchie (had he been healthier); Wheatley looked like dog poo last
to understand the Carolina “Conflict”, one must be a more evolved fantasy football
creature, but to sum it up: any football scout with skills knew/would know
that Biakabutuka, when healthy, which, granted, was not often, was, in
fact, an NFL-caliber starting tailback; Seifert knew this and, if you have
any ability to read between the lines, liked Timmy. Huntley, on the
contrary, stunk, stinks and will always stink and was brought in simply to
light a fire under Biakabutuka’s butt. This strategy was actually
working and Tim was holding on to his #1 spot in, moreover, what was a
make-or-break season for him. Unfortunately, he “broke.” Huntley still
amounted to nothing, evidenced by where he is now, as in not back in
Carolina and fourth on the depth chart.
of these scenarios I stated in elaborate terms again and again on the
threads and had to constantly fend off the “geeks.”
The point of all of this is that every year there are situations
that, to the savvy and seasoned fantasy footballer, obviously point in a
particular direction and will, in all likelihood, bear out a foreseeable
conclusion, yet will have to be fought over with the idiots. Without
further ado, here are, in no particular order, some guys set up for
success this year, and regardless of the debates that are (being) waged on
internet message boards and chatrooms, or on bar stools or living room
couches for that matter, do not be conned into believing otherwise:
Brad Johnson, Buccaneers
– I have beaten this horse dead, through rigor mortis and now on
into the decomposition stages. To get my take on Brad, peruse my last
piece located at: http://www.fantasyfootballer.com/stegeman/johnsonsucks.htm.
Terry Glenn, Packers
– This guy is so set up to succeed with the master Brett Favre and a
franchise known for its rags-to-riches mystique. Terry has skills and has absolutely no competition for his gig as Favre’s #1 “right-hand
man.” Do not let anybody tell you otherwise. He has “great value”
written all over him this year.
Travis Henry, Bills
– Do not let the hype about Shawn Bryson fool you. Henry is their
guy. Bryson could get traded and have some value, but as it stands now,
with the Bills, Bryson = Darick Holmes… remember him? Barely, right?
Michael Pittman, Buccaneers
– I get a kick out of how guys are reacting to Pittman over at the
boards. It is like they have been sniffin’ at the garbage bin and see
this one untouched Nutter Butter cookie (Pittman) and do not know whether
they should pick it up and eat it or not. Moreover, they are looking over
both shoulders trying to make sure they are not seen doing what they are
doing... kind of like the way they sniffed and skulked around the Priest
last year. Same commentary, same lackluster predictions, same rhetoric!
2,169 yards and 10 TD’s later?!?!?! I am not saying that Pittman will be
this year’s Holmes, leading the league in rushing and all. But, let’s
face the facts. Gruden handpicked the guy. He has Wheatley 2000 written
all over him. Temper your predictions, but know that 1,100 to 1,250 yards
rushing and 7 to 9 touchdowns are “in the cards,” now that Pittman is
not “with the Cards.”
Kevan Barlow, 49ers
– Garrison Hearst was thē
story… of last year. Now is the time for the 49ers to get on with their
future, which at the position of tailback is Barlow. Hearst will still get
some, but Barlow will get more TD’s and if any“one” is getting
1,000 yards there, it will be
Ricky Williams, Dolphins
– This is pretty much a no-brainer, but I have seen the occasional
thread expressing concern over Williams and how productive he will be this
year. Listen, on my main team in my main league, the GBRFL,
I have both Holmes and Green, and I will honestly tell you that with Norv
Turner in Miami I expect Ricky Williams to be the #2 fantasy back this
Raghib Ismail, Cowboys
– The ’Boys offense and, moreover, their passing game will improve
this year, and Ismail, not Galloway, will be the greater beneficiary.
While all the hype continues to go to Galloway, it was Ismail, who put up
respectable numbers in ’01, not Galloway, and Ismail actually suffered
his ACL injury EIGHT weeks later than Galloway. Do not get very lofty with
your projections, but just know that Ismail is the better choice of the
two and can be had five to, perhaps, ten rounds later.
on Fantasy Football"
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