Take me back to this year's Trash Talkin'!
View the Best of 1999 Trash Talkin' View the Best of 2001 Trash Talkin'
First, i would like to congradulate the new champion Stegman. Now on to some important issues. Lets face it, there is only 3 teams in the league that really have any shot in contending which are Dave B, Stegmans and of course mine. Yes, i had some bad luck with injuries last year but i am back. Frank, you finally had some great draft picks and had a good year but you blew it at the end of course. Parsons i dont know what you are thinking about smacking your gums so early about your team you must of been directing it to one of your other leagues because in this leauge there is only one team and that is The Nation of Domination. You are a rookie until proven other wise, so show some respect, or should i say earn it then you can talk until then ZIP IT!!!!!Other wise i wanted to wish everyone luck this year, and hopefully there will be some more surprises this year again. I mean its about time that we finally have more then a few teams competing.. Owner and the soon to be Champion Again Big Dan Feder of The Nation of Domination!!!!!!!!!!
Zip it huh? Hell no! Steve told me that one of the best things about this league was the trash talking. I love this stuff :). KICK ASS and take names has always been a good motto for me. As long as we dont get into talking about people mothers, other family members, political parties, or sexual preferences, he said it was wide open.
I wont start by slamming certain people for they way they write...I'll get to that later in the season. :) I realize that my team needs serious work. It should only take me 1 year to turn this shitty team around. 11 keeper players per team makes that task very difficult. I am in for the long haul though, and can endure 1 -2 years of rebuilding. I would say that my team is a top 6 team. Last years record is misleading. I have Jamal back this year, a solid group of wrs, a very good defense, but my QBs suck. I am still learning the scoring system. A QB here, a RB there and I should have a good team. I am far from a rookie as my resume shows. They say anything looks good on paper...anything except BIG DAN'S grammar that is! Sorry, I couldn't resist. I look forward to meeting most of you at the draft. Whats more is i look forward to Kicking some ass this year as the SPOILER. Good luck this season, as I know some of you will need it.
Just a little amendment to Joe's message above, as established by 1999 GBRFL "Trash Talkin'" precedent, making cracks "about people's mothers, other family members, political parties, or sexual preferences" is acceptable,...you bunch of bastard, trailer-trash, commie homos! ; )
Welcome to the league Joe! Please try not to equate the average intellect of a GBL owner to that of our resident grammar specialist Big duesch Fedder. He's still trying to convince me that Charlie Batch is a top 10 QB. Anyhow, last place awaits your prolific resume and vast knowledge of ff. Your QB's however, still make mine look like world-beaters. Dear Frankie foot-in-the-mouth, can we polish your new tropht with your remaining tears from last year you incipid puss-bag. good luck choking again this year on Stegeman's prick you butt-fucking homo.
So here we are exactly 24 hours before the start of this long awaited football season. It goes without saying that this year is huge. Stegeman and I are both going after our third rings, we have a cocky new owner, Feder's team looks better than ever and some of the shittier teams have some upside in their rosters and could pull off what Frank did last year.
But who are we kidding? The truth is that although I admittedly had a terrible year last year, my team is stacked and I fully intend to take this league. Just as I had done two years ago, when I declared myself the '98 Champ at the draft, I am hereby declaring myself and my new team, Money in the Banks, the '00 Champ!
Here we go, the day after all of the games i get a call from Vic flapping his pie hole how great his team is and how shitty everyone elses team especially mine is now that i lost galloway for the season. Again here is another example of another scrub team getting hard after one week. Yes, Victor you did have a great week, your players did have the games of their lifes but i dont want to hear it, you didnt even play me. Go talk trash to whoever you did play. Until we play just zip it.Congradulations but you should be calling Joe Parsons giving him shit." Humm Joe your team is in trouble i might not fall into the cellar this year you better look out because this game cock is going between your ass." Vic be real your team is a little improved but you are not on my level still, call Joe Parsons he is more on your level. I admit i am hurting a little with galloway now out and getting ripped on the curtis ennis deal ect.. but i still have my core guys and i am still the team to beat. As for this week , i got blown away by Hahns sick defensive performance by the Cowboys, nice pick up and i am in a battle with Trouts team but tonight will tell all. For the rest of you, until you all win a few games keep your pie holes shut, i guess if i placed last and always lost i would get excited to after one good week. I know how you feel Vic!!!!!
Vic maybe you think that i am not a real doctor but at least i do not have to wake up at 5 A.M to make the doe.You flip pizzas for a living. Oh and if you want to talk about being smart, i have Hatian patients with more of an education then what you have. For a guy who sits around behind a counter flipping pizzas and making doe while listening to sports radio all day, you would think your team is better then it is. Whoopie you are 2 and 0 now. I understand why you are so happy, you won 2 games all last season.
You see what you vic and the other scrub teams dont understand is that with a team as talented as mine is i can afford to lose Galloway and I can afford to make a bad trade like getting Ennis. I just slip Peter Warrick in there (who is going to be better then any of your recievers vic) and Huntly or J.R Redmond when he is healthy. Offense is not what wins in this league its Defense. Seeing that i have the 2 best ones in the league, i will ride them all year if need be. If you dont think that is true ask Hahn or Trout.(Nice defenses)
I wasn't gonna' get on this thing and interrupt these two morons in their quest for a clue, but after listenin' to Feder, the deluded one who always has the best team, but only ONE championship, flap his gums all week about his team and then doin' some HOMEWORK, I couldn't resist. Feder calls me. While munchin' on some chips, he tells me how he's been rubbin' on Haitian clit all day and lickin' his fingers and how he's gonna' crush me this week. He spews out how "Richard Huntley, man, Richard Huntley, man, he's startin' this week, man. Bettis is done, man! Huntley's the starter." I then calmly inquire, "Whatever! Pittsburgh's offense sucks anyway! I wouldn't want any of those suckers! But, just out of curiosity, Danny, who are they playing this week?" Dr. Danny replies in Feder-speak, "I don't know, man! He's the starter this week, man! I'm not sure who they play, man, but he'll be starting!" I suppose he will have a good game this week since they probably have scheduled a game against the Sewickley High School Freshman Girls' Field Hockey Team this Sunday as it's their bye-week, you platypus-twat-suckin' idiot. What's up, Doc? Moreover, what is up with that self-proclamation about being "the team to beat", ala chiquitta slut Frankie? Last time I checked I was the defending champ, and you haven't won one for 3 years. Maybe, if you were a little bit of a better GM and stopped deluding yourself with how good your team always is and know when your players' off-weeks are, you'd have a little more to show for it. Instead, you are just a babbling schmuck with a mere single championship to your name!
As for you Vic, is your middle name Tim? You're already starting with the excuses, "I'm in year two of my three-year plan." Knock-knock, knucklehead, once again an old cliche proven true. Birds of a feather flock together. Mr. Self-proclaimed GM of the Year, you were in the same position last year. As a matter of fact, you were 3-0 after Week 2, while I was a lowly 0-4. Then, the scholar comes out, "'Galloway' is spelled with a 'G' not a 'g'." That's the biggest error you could find. Guess that's why you're not deliverin' the pizzas, not smart enough.
I just wish the two of you would hop up on one of Dr. Danny's play doctor tables and with a couple 12" veiny dildo's rub some pizza oil all up over each others' taints and suck some ass like the couple of homos you are 'cause that's what you're gonna' be doin' soon enough.
It doesn't matter where you are after Week 1. It matters where you are after Week 17, you suckers.
Stegdork you can splatter your teeth all day, you are next. Get off of last year, its over, you had the off season to enjoy it. You already lost to a shit team in Vics!! All i got to say is this,i am glad you still think its O.K to have a slow start by losing games in the beginning of the season. The fact is you are going to lose this week to so at least you wont be too upset. Oh, yes i must say this. What the hell is up with your shakespear lingo in your trash talk. I think you have been around to many communists teaching the russians or the rice eaters the english language.( excuse me i forgot about your wife dont take it to heart). I know my english grammer isnt as up to par as yours is Mr. Helper but no one understands what the hell you are talken about.With that said get ready for your ass to be whipped!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
That was funny as hell. "Sewickley High School Freshman Girls' Field Hockey Team" Haaaaa. I didn't appreciate that Chicita thing though. As Macbeth would say " He hath honour'd me of late, and I bought golden opinions from all sorts of people, which would be worn now in their newest gloss, not cast aside so soon."
Frank, that was beutiful, that brought tears to my eyes!! Are you sure you have a dick between your legs!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
P.S- Talken about women, where are you hidden trout??? Take your skirt off and take your ass whippen like you should!!
Steg and Fedder,
Steg: I want to congratulate you for the thorough dismantling of my team in week I...so much for that preseason ranking. Danny: I want to congraDulate you and your coaches as well, whoever the hell that was if the guy you wanted wasn't available you fuckin' retard. By the way, if Curtis has some free time next week (from pulling splinters out of his ass), I could really use a busboy. Sincerely, The last place bitch...........
Trout, nice hearing from you. By the way before you make fun of my english, my last name is FEDER.
You are right ennis is picking wood from his ass, maybe he can join steve young in the broadcast booth!!!!!
Evidently the minimum requirements of RIF and Hooked on Phonics were not prerequisites at your Chiropractic school, or, should I say, Pyrocracktic 'cause you must be flamin' up a big fuckin' crack-pipe and then holdin' up that same lighter to your crev"ass"e and talkin' to me as usual out of your asshole like Jim Carey after chowin' a bowl of beans, you Pyrocracktor! Listen up there methane breath, we got 15 weeks to go, and until then, fact is, I am your defending champion. Also, stop takin' your occupational insecurities out on the rest of us. We don't need to be reminded of the pathetic, ever-defensive existence of a pyrocracktor by another doctor-wanna-be. We all are well aware that they give pyrocracktors the title "Dr." so all of the real physicians in the world have someone to make fun of at conventions and seminars. Anyway, what is the name of that "clinic" ; ) ; ) you work at down there? -- Oh, I can't remember...it's like...Something Mr. Dangle's...something little boys...something...gay Thai-style...something Massage Parlor. We got a few places up here on 42nd Street that would put you to "work" in a sec, Doc, or, if you are more into the high-end asshole, I'm sure there's a "space you could fill" up in Greenwich Village. BTW, FYI that's not pronounced "Green", Doc. But, you probably already know that "area" well, huh?
High guyes. Soorie that it has takin so long for I to rite on the trach talken page. MY TEAM IS TERRABLE!!!!
On the Brigher side, I have started taken a great course at the locale commun college here in denver. The course is called "How to be like Feder ... An Indrotucion."
As you can see, the professors fell it is impotent to learn good english and tiping scills, and that is what we are covering this year.
However, I cannot talk TOO much trash as Dan kicked my ass in wk 1, as well as every other team I have played.
I dont know where everyone thinks my grammer is retarded. Its kinda funny!Just because i dont fuck Shakespear in the ass like stegman. Anyways, i understand.
I can understand some hostility here for KICKING THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE I PLAY, but lets come up with some new material!!
I dent now abut yur ggrammir butt nise yob beeting mee bi won point width 2 runing baks tide behynd mi bak and know difence. (If that's the best you've got, you have some solid beatings to look forward to in the coming weeks from Frank Gonzalez and "The Cure". One week and counting for my team to be full strength and ready to show what they can do.)
Yeah, I kicked the champions ass this week, but it is still early. I was on vacation and did not even submit any waiver moves... Strike 1 I guess.... I notified Steve before I left for vacation. I don't feel i have much to brag about. His guys all had off weeks and my guys did ok.
Fuck being politically correct! Steve I CRUSHED you. I am barely above .500 and that could change any week. I am still looking to trade a wr. Moulds, Tim Brown, and Rocket are all on the table. Pick one and get back to me, I am looking for another starting rb.
Dear Dokter FeDDer; I'm prescribing a good dose of weeks off against my squad to rest that ailing back of yours. It seems that the pain your feeling is from a combiNATION of double teams in all available orfices fron the likes of Warner and Bruce. Enjoy your early glory now; you'll probably still be looking at that 5 in the win column after week 13. (That's the week I come and rape your women and children again) As for you Frank, your team is definitely the real deal...even Kurt agrees on that one. See ya in week 6..(Kurt will be watching from home....ouch!) Sincerely, one of the bums without a ring.(unless calling Mrs. Feder counts as a ring)
A few things i need to say.Well really two things.
1) Trout you are such a loser!!!!!!! Figures you would be flapping your gap at a victory when like my whole team was off. Not to make excuses but, i had only 1 reciever and 1 running back, oh and no kicker. I am glad you think you are so much more superior then me. I guess you forget very quick when i crushed you when we both had are full squads playing.
2) And for the ( RED NECK), that will be the chew eating in-breed Big Joe P..NICE DEFENSE. You should of made that deal i offered you. At least go pick up a defense from the free agent market. Get on your horse and ride into town, because i know you dont have a computer in the HILLS and get a real defense. At least get our scoring system down a little. No Joe, defense is worth more then 6 points total. Maybe if you spent some time learning about our leauge scoring you would do a little better and win some more games.
Dear Danny(My Owna), Coach, please gimme da damn ball next week.. I means look..Faulk is off next week, Terrell over Trouts house mowin' da lawn again(on that bad ankle, ouch!) I means come on coach I'll gives you atleastum 2-3 carries and mights even make it out of the backfields if yuse is nice to me...come on coach member when we skipped Inglish class all dem years ago! Damn it...you owes me one! Oh, and bys da way, great job trading away our defence with dem three shutouts this year...you is such a genius!!!!!
Thats very funny but while you are picking the shit out of your nose as you are looking up at me in the standings i am forming my game plan. No problem. You see TROUT,,this is the second time you get a hard on that my player is off this week or my player is hurt.I am a fucking genius because i am still winning. Thats what makes me a genius. I can understand that everyone gets happy when my players are off a week or hurt because nobody can hang when my full squad is playing. So keep on talking shit about my players and i will mail you a toothpick to dig the shit out of your nose.
MY team is shaping up into a solid team. Surprising since it was assembled by a tobacco chewing REDNECK in the foothills of VA. You Cityslickers had better watch out.
I look forward to kicking your asses and i already told Steve to order the engraving with my name on it. I realize that I don't have the best team but i'm getting there. Frank, GREAT TRADE of Warner for Taylor DUMBASS!!!! It seems that Taylor will bring you the #1 pick in the draft next year...at least you got something good for Warner.
Are you really as GAY as you sound JOE???????????
Hee-Haw! Joey cracked-corn is finally openin' up a bit. I reckon this id be a good time to serve you some good ol' fashion brown-eyed pie... Just like that SHIT Maw use to make...It seems there's more useless players on your roster than there are cars at a NASCRAP race. Is it possible that all your running backs might in fact be cousins? Inquiring city slickers would like to know... Send your reply to the soon-to-be first place FLESHEATERS!!!
Dear "..", I guess that you don't have enough BALLS to post who you are. Are you afraid to admit that you are JEALOUS of Ned Beatty because he got the part in the movie "Deliverance" instead of you? "Squeal like a pig" and "Boy you sure got a pretty mouth" are probably tatooed on your arm. LMAO. I'm not gay, thats just the way we do things around here. ;)
It is true that my Rb corp are mainly backups, but you must admit they are better than Vics. Steve said that the trash talk was one of the best things about this league. We are only 1/2 way through the season. You never know what will happen next.
Does "LMAO" mean like "The Mayonnaise" in Spanish or something? As in you guys will be wiping the "LMAO" from the BLACKSmiths dicks off your chins after the Defending League Champions squeeze one out on ya's after taking 4 in a row this week over Dick Dangler's Cockgames.
There are a few things i need to say. First and foremost is to Joe, the sheep fucking, chew dipping, fiddle player who thinks that his team is so good. I give you credit that you have turned your team around into somewhat respectable, but dont flap your GUMS because i know you dont have any teeth about you beating teams like The Nation of Domination as you found out this past weekend.I think you should continue to tend to your sheep and tobbaco fields and give up on the fantasy aspect of your life because you now know now that you cant compete with the best. As, for TROUT.... Yes i know, Terrel Davis is killing me, Joey Galloway is out, Curtis Ennis sucks, Mushin Muhammid is always hurt, I only have 2 Running backs every week.. What the fuck, i keep dominating this leauge. The scary thing is is when Terrel comes back and even whats going to happen next year when Galloway is back. You see Trout, when you become the dominating GM that i am, you dont have to worry about when other teams players are off and whos players are hurt it doesnt matter. I will keep winning. Grab your sack one week and say to yourself, boy i hope i am playing a team whos full squad is healthy so i can beat the best. Stop being such a PUSSY hoping to play teams that are down one week. Frank, as you notice i dont pick on you any more because you make this league great.By this i mean i never have to worry about you ever winning this league again. When you made what has to be the worst trade in are leagues history by getting rid of Warner for Fred Taylor. You are almost as bad as Hahn. I mean at least you dont finally build yourself a respectable squad and trade it all away for garbage like Hahn does. Hahn i have a question for you. Are you living in a cardboard box. I mean for sure you are one of these cats that when you come home at night your have your weekly paycheck spent in lottery tickets. You are like Woody H in the movie White Men Cant Jump. Stop building other teams championships. Year after year you piss away your good players for shit. Havent you learned your lesson Hahn? As for the rest of you, especially you Mr. Footbal Insider, i will be looking forward to the up coming weeks.
Okay, scumbags! First, I want to congratulate Rob Pak on his being part of GBRFL history and eventual folklore. Going into the 4th quarter of Monday night's game, i.e. literally with just 1 quarter remaining in the week, Rob and his "Fudge Packmen" were "beating" me by 3 points. Now, it is not unbelievable that a team would come back from such a small deficit and win the game, but to come back and win by 37 points with 1 quarter of 1 game left. OUCH! Congratulations on making the record books with me in the same fashion as Minut Bol on a Michael Jordan poster, an allusion which makes me think of other nubians. Joe Parsons, cheerio on gettin' over on Markie, by the way a former GBRFL Champion, in that trade. I think you're a solid 1-3 since then, with your most recent loss coming to Gonzo, you know, the DUMBASS who also happens to be a former GBRFL Champion. Starting to see a theme here? It is perfectly illustrated in the following preseason quote from our in-house wordsmith, who also is a former GBRFL Champion, "You are a rookie until proven otherwise, so show some respect, or should i say earn it then you can talk until then ZIP IT!!!!!" Hope you're doin' better in those other 78 leagues you play in 'cause, as D.T. predicted early on, "last place awaits your prolific resume and vast knowledge of FF." Well, maybe not last place as "Vic"tim seems hellbent on achieving that distinction. Vic, I know you're never gonna' read this as the jury is still out on your reading skills being a friend of our resident grammarian Dr. Danny, but if you want to take a refresher course in "Free-agency 101," feel free to enroll in the Stegemanian Institute for the Fantasy Football Challenged. Either that or just follow the fuckin' games and pick up some dudes so, at least, you avoid playing with just ONE running back like you did this past week. Finally, Danny, where are you? You're not calling me every 5 minutes this week to talk about your team like you usually do. Wonder why?
Oh Danny boy! As Steg noted you enjoyed a quiet serving of humble pie from Mark the guy you love to rip all the time. It seems your depleted band of beetle - dick licking, splinter-ass collecting, anal-probe takin , Nation of gay relations took it on the chin this week. Not to worry, I (yes this letter is supposed to be capitalized fuck stick),understand there's a real game going on next week in the league; and a chance for you to finally see some good teams in action. As predicted earlier, you'll once again be lookin' up at me next time I slay your fuckin' pansie-ass squad. Later pussy.
Well boys, lets make it a trio of red neck stompin messages. Dear, dear Joe, although it wasn't a thorough thrashing (My defenses suck) it must be painful to be beaten by a team carrying someone as lowly as Fred Taylor (averaging a poultry 130 yards from scrimmage. It would have been more of a thrashing if I had Warner (out 4-6 weeks) I'm sure. Gentlemen, I'm not claiming genious in trading away Warner fro Taylor, but I'm quite happy with the trade now that Taylor is coming on strong. You girls will just have to put up with my two other sorry quarterbacks (who are doing just as well as Warner)for the remainder of the season as well as a VERY balnced running game. Maybe I won't blow people away like I did ast year, but I'll be able to win the critical ones at the end of the year. Don't count out Monistat ladies, it just may come back to plug you in the ASS.
Dear Dr. Dan,
I am having a problem with my fantasy football team. It seems that I have been heavily critized by other fantasy football owners for my apparent ability to trade good players from my team to other teams, and receive no value in return.
Case in point in the most recent week of league play, I went up against one Corey Dillon, who used to reside on my squad. And do you know what? Mr. Dillon had a CAREER day against me. Further, I played against the defense that also used to be on my team, Tampa Bay, and they had just a terrific game against Detroit.
I am an idiot. I mean, what was I thinking? Trading all my good players for scrubs sure was foolish. I just wish that in week eight, I could have beat that all-powerful Nation of Dumbnation. But who would of (oops, a little Danny slip) thought that I would run up against the running back that had the game of his career? Not me, by golly.
Anyway, if I could just get some words of wisdom from you, it would be a blessing. Your insight is always right on the money.
p.s. SUCKS TO BE YOU!
What the hell is going on here? I really haven't checked the trash out for a while, but there is a lot of weird shit going down.
I think Danny is just happy that he is no longer the whipping boy. It looks like redneck jokes have replaced Danny's ebonics. I must say Joe, I really give a shit if you think your team is shaping up! I really do. I would love to hear more, in fact(about as much as I would like to see another fucking report on Moses Moreno on football insider).
I really must be seeing things because it looks as though Danny is claiming to be a genious, but Frank is not. What is going on? I still have no idea what Trout is talking about. Maybe I need to watch some gay pornos or something to have some idea. I am still trying to figure out who is Mr. Squishy.
I must admit that my team sucks this year. I may make a comeback but I still am horrible. But what can I do when I am going against Mr. Football himself and Mr. Footballinsider.
I just wish that there are more songs in the trashtalk, just like the good old days!
I have been out of town for the last 2 weeks in the hills with Joe P. As you guys know, it takes a long time to travel there due to the fact of no cars only horse and buggy!! Having that been said i was blow away reading the trash talk page for the first time in a while. How the fuck do you guys have the nerve to talk shit about me. I have been kicking all your asses all year. ( Especially yours Steve) With all of my injuries you would think that i would not be doing this good. As you know it is hard to keep a super star down!! When i am out of first place,then you guys can talk shit, until then keep your flaps zipped.
Any of you girls see a sorry ass GameCOCK around here anywere? I'm sure I saw one running away with his panties around his ankles, crying and whining something about "they never let me win". Well Miss Warner, my condolences on taking over that poor excuse for a pop-warner team Vic called his own. Talk about a rebuilding project. Let's see if you have the stomach for it. If you're still around for the draft next year, I might consider trading for your number one pick. Love always, Frank Gonzalez - Owner of soon to be number 1 - Monistat 22 (as long as I survive this week - I am playing BOTH of the pretty princesses ahead of me in the standings)
Thanks for the welcome! I have been watching this league from afar am and glad to get in! My question to you is about your team:
So am I to understand from your team name that you suffer from yeast infections? Or do you just use Monistat for anal lube? Is that why you"... saw [some]one running away with his panties around his ankles, crying and whining...."?
Well, aint we havin cozy fun in the 9 Win Club. Sorry Steg, you weren't involved. Thanks for leaving all the productive BlackSmiths on the bench this week by the way. You must be following your own Football Weekly or Insider or whatever advice. Maybe spending a little less time preaching and a little more time practicing would help. Dan, this message was originaly going to tell you that I was gunning for you, but.... you shot yourself so now I call my own shots. I'll see you and your Painkillers or whatever... in two weeks. Miss Warner, nice job on the win this week, you're already doing better thean the GameCock. But...Monistat CURES putrid, smelly, oozing infections that the other girls in this league are familiar with. Well anyway, good buy ladies. Monistat is here!!
That's okay, Francis. I had my own exclusive "20 Win" Party at the end of last season, ...at your expense by the way, and I did not have to invite Mr. Squishy and Dr. Doogie Feder.
I have been out of town for a month and its nice to see people going at it with each other. Steve you just need to keep your mouth shut!!You just need to worry about how many points i am going to kick your ass next time we play again, for the 3rd straight time. I know my team has been down and of course more injuries to my star players. ( Do not get too hard Trout)Again this will not be a problem. The genuis that i am will continue to once again dominate in the upcoming weeks. Get ready!!!!!!!!!!
Wow. It seems that the Mountain Man from down South is making a run. Actually, Joe I believe you were 5-3 and have only gotten worse by your trades in the past few weeks. The only thing that you are getting from behind is ... actually, I'll leave the end of that sentence to Trout who loves to comment on such things.
I think there is another team that is actually making a real run. That's right, the kid is back, baby. You guys didn't think that I would settle for a shitty seaon, did you?
Uhhh... let's see I'm 2-6 maybe I will just trade my entire team for a much better one. I ain't singing no ten little indians songs or nothing, but I am en fuego.
Mountain Man, pal, I do see you in my rear view mirror, but that was as I blew right by you as you broke down on the side of the road. My finely tuned Monistat sports car didn't even slow down. It seems the guy driving it, one Fred Taylor, keeps going faster and faster. Too bad he's such a shitty player and has no place on this team. Well, I think I'll keep him anyway. He might get a few more yards for me this year. I'm thinking about 1500 when it's all said and done. Damn my shitty trade. Mr Banks, I have just The Cure for that fuego thing you've got going on. I think a little dose of Monistat 22 will take care of you just fine. Although it has been known to agravate the recipient in the past. Always a pleasure ladies. Let me know if anyone needs a little Mojo. I stole some this weekend but it's gone bad and I'm gonna throw it out anyway.
Well first, Let me tip my cap to the two hemoroids(did i fuk that spelling up Dr?) who have to this point prevented me from running away from this sorry field. Joe, kudos on the trade that keeps you on life support a few more weeks. Frank, I can't swallow on the trash talk page, but let me once again acknowledge your squad on being the real deal. I mean shit, who can beat a team that now has the likes of Jon-two-touchdowns-to-my-twenty-ints-Kitna as his new #2 QB? Atleast we won't have to change the name on that second place trophy this year! Imagine the commissioner's fees we'll save Joe! And finally, soon-to-be-last, and always least Dr. Feather. It seems your squad, like your practice I'm sure, has dropped from the back, to the lower anal regions. A place you fit really well SHIThead! Time to relegate that third-world 22-piece crack pipe squad of yours to O.R.(That's real doctor's lingo for operating room dumbass) Love, the dream team!
Well Mr. Trout, there are at least 2 teams that can't beat me with the likes of Jon-two-touchdowns-to-my-twenty-ints-Kitna. As a matter of fact, they can't beat me with one quarterback AND one Runningback tied behind my back AND no Defense to show for it. If it weren't for my miserable trade in getting Fred Taylor I probably would have done better. Damn that trade, Damn it. I'll be regretting that trade all the way to the end of the season WHEN I'M CHAMPION!!!!!!!!!!!! Love Always, Frank
You City Slickers kill me. I trade away my best/ONLY wr, give up a good rb for a draft pick, continue to bother Steve about Grbac, and still manage to win some games. Hmmm. Maybe its the moonshine...
I dont see my team as having the talent to make a run, but may finish in the top 3. I did enjoy kicking some ass the past few weeks, without a legit #3 rb. Frank, my hat is off to you buddy. I doubted the Taylor/Warner deal from day one. It seems to be paying off for you. Good luck the rest of the season. You have a very good team. Please slow down a bit though. I have been chasing you since week 8. All i see is tailights. As the "Nation of DECENT" continues his mired mid-season slump you and i have crept up unnoticed. With only a few weeks left the top[ 4 teams right now are the only guys with a real shot to take it all. The rest are fighting for draft order. I will take great pleasure in 4th place, ending higher than last year CHAMP. WE still ahve many games left, but Stevie needs to win 90% of his to get there...i dont see that happening. Good lucks boys. All you need is a few more solid weeks.
Where is everybody???????????????????????
I win a few games...by the skin of my ass BTW...and you guys don't say shit? I expected to be getting slammed by you boys. The city slickers have nothing to say? Hmmm, as i gently sip some lightnin'. AHHHHHHHH.. GOOD STUFF. Ok back to FF:
Steve, you can disregard what i told you at the draft...I'm having too much fun. Lucky...maybe. Skilled...sure. Cocky...FUCKIN' "A"!!! This i never envisioned. Coming into a new league, with a shitty team. I have no 3rd RB, I get nothing from 1 of my wrs. My DEF has help more than I thought. Thanks Danny. I owe ya a beer at least... Or a tasty pint. I put in a fresh chew, let the dog out, feed the chickens, and went to the BARN to check my email. Imagine my surprise to see me in 1st place...WOW. No shock to me though. I'm in 1st in 3 other leagues too. I'm certain that some of you boys are pretty pissed about now. There are still plenty of games left though. Like i said before, if Ii finish in the top 4 I will be pleased. Oh well, there are still a few games left. Ya never know. This should get some of ya fired up. LMAO.( Laugh My Ass Off) for some of you that don't know what LMAO stands for. I have been asked by some guys in other leagues to form a brand new league. New draft, 20 players, TOTAL KEEPER Entry fee is $300. It pays $25 per week to high score. 1st place gets $2000. If anybody is interested let me know.
As long as everyone understands that my strategy is to lie low in the second spot so as not to be jinxed like I was last year, I can feel good in congratulating the Rebel on a good victory. I believe he pulled it out on Monday night with the likes of Herbert Hoover or whoever the hell he was. It's perfect that he beats me with the replacement for my injured 3rd RB. It's tough being on top of the mountain as the vultures fight for the scraps in the free agent pool. I only get a few bones thrown at me. I guess that's good news for you Trout. You get early dibs at the next Herbert Hoover. Congratulations also to Mr. En Fuego. Beating the bottom of the standings still counts for something. Blacksmiths!!!! Where are you???? I've been looking for you to pull you last minute drive at the end of the season, but I guess I'm not looking far enough down in the standings. Look out Rob, I think Stegman is gunning for your 1st round pick. To the rest of yah, see you in the winners circle. With you on the outside looking in of course. Danny!! Stop fogging up the windows!! If you shake it more than twice.........
Listen here you tie-dyed wearing little hick, you should spit out some chew and think for a second before you talk. You really made sense saying... "Imagine my surprise to see me in first place...WOW... No shock to me though."
Maybe now you could also stop bitching about Ahman Green and your lack of a rb as if somebody actually gives a shit. Ahman Green totally hooked you up by personally beating Squishy on Monday Night Football. Let me ask, in your other leagues, do you tell everyone about your teams, your team's good points, bad points, ect. or do you just honor us with this great insight?
Frank, I know you said you have trouble with english, but Trout is not exactly a bottom feeder in the standings, at least not yet. I guess there's not much shit to talk about me, except that I beat the bad teams? Ok, I made the schedule.
All I know is that I am far from out of this championship. If I come back from 2-6 and win my third, then I am truly the man.
DB, I guess you are greener than what steve informed me of. I was thinking that you guys were "THE SHIT", my mistake. If you cant tell by now whats going on then nevermind, maybe you can ask Steve to fill ya in. If not him, then I'm certain that one of the other City Slickers can assist you. If not, then there are books that you can buy...
Could somebody please tell me who has the most points in here this year...anyone...anyone...Bueler...Buerler...
Looks like I got my ass kicked this week. Maybe I should have kept JAX def? Oh well, good thing I only had 1 game.
I've never seen so many three legged horses limping to the finish line in all my life. Myself included of course. It's gonna be a free for all in the next three weeks. I'm looking forward to it. It looks like the person that can actually start a full roster in the next few weeks will probably pull it out. Nice job this week Dan. Thank your lucky stars for your defense - AGAIN.
Steve, congrats on the win. I'm sure it was sweet revenge for the 79-0 ass whoopin' I gave you earlier in the year. I get Jamal back this which should help. It may have been closer Anderson didnt have a top 10 NFL record day and disect my starting DEF. That and the fact i went went up against the best wrs corp in this league.
Well Trout, looks likes its me and you, mano a mano, this week. Sorry Steve I'm looking past you. No offense. No, really, you have no Offense. Trout, don't worry yourself about any of these other wanabes in the standings, it's all about you and me. It' gonna come down to the last week in the standings, just like last year, but now I'M the UNDERDOG. I like those odds. Fred and Edgerin and Payton and Joe love those odds. It's gonna be a good couple weeks. Sit back everyone and enjoy the show.
Mr. Gonzo; Well Frank I've petitioned the aid of the commish and his 1999 voodoo doll to help pull this one out. May the best non-hick win this god-damn thing...By the way cuzzin Joe, thanks for the Jax. Defense..Merry X-mas to you and yours!
Well, well. Looks like I play the other two parts of the Ahman Green love triangle. Of course, I will have to play the Greenman himself.
I must say that in the uncharacteristic role of spoiler (for the second strait year) I get to play and hopefully knock out of contention the two dudes that I would would love to beat the most. Steve, I can't let you win three rings before I do, nor can I let you win back to back. I simply do not have the time to read 10 page trash talks this year. Joe, what can I say? I thoroughly enjoyed our early morning weekend chats. However, I have no idea what the fuck you were talking about in your last trash talk to me. Plus we all know that there is no way that a good ole boy can hang with us urbanites, so it is time for you to go out too. As for the other three in contention, I wish you well I still can't believe that I lost to you fools.
Dear Frank, I paused briefly( about the time it takes to fart) to consider all the implications of you winning this past weekend. As it turns out, that unsettling feeling in my gut was in fact just gas. The real SHIT came later on in the form of your teams performance this week. Is it to late to still offer my vote for Jon Kitna as the Monistat 22 infectious player of the week? Better luck next year Senor Brides Maid.
Dear Joe and Danny, Hey what a coincidence! Not only are you two butt-fucking homos tied in the standings, but your probably both tying each other up right now. As I peer down from my perch at all of you underlings, I can't help but think how you'll ever contend with this juggernaut I've assembled. I'd ofcourse like to give special thanks to so-called experts like dumbass Bohrer who RSBW'd for the second straight year. (That's Really Sucked Big Wang in southern computer lingo). Dave(the virtuoso of FF) was so kind to trade me Wheatley and Alexander for Marcus-I-couldn't-catch-a-cold-the-second-half-of-the-season, and the stellar Nappy-hair Kaufman. Let me not forget that #1 pick for next year...(this means Dave will have the first shot at Nate Means again). And Frank, despite all the negative hoopla over the Warner for Taylor trade, it managed to work out for you. On a serious note, my pompous, self-effacing ass, would really like to thank everyone for a truly competitive and exciting season.(Especially the commish for a first rate job). It's only fitting, that I get to squash the new dude (our favorite Hillbilly) in the super bowl next week. Hide the women and children, and multitudes of cousins next week Joey; Flesh is coming to town.
Listen Trout you inconsiderate fool. You have such a good shot to win this thing because I kicked Joe's ass. I was able to do that because of the deals I was able to make following our deal. In case you havent noticed, I actually have a better record than you since we made that trade in week 9. Joe, it must hurt that Ahman Green bit you in the ass the way he did.
I am obviously just bitter because I didnt win this year so I wont say anything more this year.
Before I get started why don't all of you get on your knees and bend over to the new CHAMPION!!! The Nation of Domination is in the house!!!!!Let me start with the Redneck. Joe let me make this short. I know you have bitched that my team is not that good, that I don't deserve to win etc..Here are 3 facts asshole 1) I kicked the shit out of you 3 out of 4 times we played. 2) Your record is 16-10, while mine is 17-9 3) I am champion, you are a loser. Feel the fucking pain!!! To make things sit a little more with your thoughts, think about this. You are right, on paper my team is not all that strong. Basically I played the whole season with 2RBs and 2WRs. That just shows you how fucking sorry your team is!!Something to look forward to for next year is when I get some of my other players healthy so I can sweep you next year as I did Mr. Football Insider Stegeman this year.Go crawl back up a sheep's ass, I am done with you!!!! As for you Trout, send me your address so I can send you a can of Pledge to clean your shelves because just like every other year, you once again have no trophy to hang up. What a loser you are. You are like in the same category as the Bengels. You fucking suck every year, you have never won a title, and you are a loser!!! You talk a lot of smack for someone who loses every year. Do me a favor though, don't quit!!! Its fun kicking the shit out of you every year!! As for the rest of you, I will see you in Disney World!!! That is, if you pay your own way!!!!
Congrats on your league championship. Too bad you are still my bitch.
Mark, i am your bitch but i have one question.How many rings do you have?
Congrats to the new CHAMP. He beat me yet again. I'll kick his ass next year. Danny I don't think you had the best team overall, but you won when it counted. 2nd PLACE!!!!!!!!! I'll take it. Not to shabby for a team that was 2nd to last a year ago. It was a lot of fun this year guys. Too bad most of were shown up by a country boy. Daunte looks like a keeper...ya think? Jamal Lewis too....hmmm
1 more draft and i should be in good shape.
I am looking for another rb. Anybody interested let me know.
Get your facts straight, dude! The team you took over came in 6th place last year, i.e 4th from last. The prior two seasons that team came in 4th, by the way. We had a guy take over a straight-up last place team a few years back and get it into 3rd place his first season. Whatever! That's as high as he's ever gotten. And, by the way, get off the gay stuff. This is the face-slappin' "Trash Talkin'" page, not the pat-yourself-on-the-back "explain your team" page. I'm with D.B. on this. Nobody cares if Daunte or Jamal are keepers, at least not in here.
I have one ring. And at the conclusion of every fantasy football season, I take my valuable ring from its case. I place the ring on my mantle in my livingroom so that I can gaze upon its glory. But yet, a sadness overcomes me and I lament," Oh, if only I could own Feder every year."
Then, almost without hesitation, I smile to myself and realize that I DO own you every year. And that, in itself, is worth its own weight in rings.
See you next year, bitch.
Mark Hahn Owner of Nation of Domination